With these next few lines, I’d like to speak into that idea and challenge you to embrace this simple, yet life changing strategy.

Why?

Because if you do, amazing things will happen in your life and business.

I promise – it works!

Twenty seconds. What if that’s all it took? Just twenty ticks of the clock to turn everything around?

There will be days when you do not feel very courageous, that you will be fearful and uncomfortable in reaching out, speaking to others, or in dealing with a challenging issue. Yet over and over again you are reminded to “BE STRONG AND HAVE COURAGE.”

How do you reconcile this gap?

Is courageous a state of being, a unique personality trait, a gift of high quality DNA, a special breed of human being?

Or can it simply be a conscious, momentary decision? Something we “take.” A choice?

(More on that choice in just a moment.)

Have you ever noticed who gets the most respect and the most rewards in life?

Look closely and notice that it’s not the wallflowers; it’s not the people that sit back and wait for others to do things for them.

Those who have accomplished much in life have been men and women with a spirit of boldness, courage and adventure.

When will your finest hour come, and how will it arrive? Do you really think it will materialize without an act of supreme courage, audacity or boldness?

What bold, courageous initiatives are you planning for today?

When you are facing a decision to act, consider it as an opportunity to prove your worth, to show whomever it is how much you believe in yourself and what you are about to discuss.

20 seconds of insane courage, are you feeling it?

Maybe courageous isn’t a word people use to describe you. But if you could muster up just 20 seconds of boldness today, 20 seconds of bravery…

What would you do?

What would you say?

Who would you call?

What would you risk?

Use these examples to frame your own expectations for your future. Then ask:

“Can I find a way, 3 times per day to demonstrate 20 seconds of insane courage in order to take my life and career to unprecedented levels?”

I know you can. The real question is…will you begin doing it today?

WHAT TO DO NOW? Embrace this simple 20 second strategy and share your victories which will inspire others to do the same.

The last ten percent thins the herd, and separates the great from the merely good.

The commitment required to complete the last ten percent is massive, and the temptation to settle for good enough is often too appealing for most to resist.

Professionals never settle.

In most fields, there’s an awful lot of work put into the last ten percent of quality.

This is where you truly sweat the small stuff as quality is about doing all things with love, care and attention to detail.

Getting your golf score from 77 to 70 is far more difficult than getting it from 120 to 113.

Making pastries the way they do at a fancy restaurant is a lot more work than making brownies at home.

The last ten percent is the signal we look for, the calling card of greatness.

Following through on the last ten percent is the way we communicate care and expertise and professionalism.

If all you’re doing is the standard amount, or settling for good enough, than all you’re going to get is the standard compensation. That’s all you really deserve.

The hard part is the last ten percent, sure, or even the last one percent, but it’s the hard part because everyone is busy doing the easy part.

Most people are not hard acts to follow as they believe that last ten percent isn’t worth the effort.

How wrong and causality creating this belief is.

The secret is to go the extra mile, to do more, better quality work and to finish the last ten percent strong.

That is the key to greatness, and that’s why everything counts!

WHAT TO DO NOW? Share your two-cents worth on the significance of the final ten percent of a project or goal.

He started his longitudinal study by offering a group of 4-year-olds one marshmallow, but told them that if they could wait for him to return after running an errand, they could have two marshmallows.

The “errand” took about fifteen minutes. The theory was that those children who could wait would demonstrate that they had the ability to delay gratification and control impulse.

Mischel varied the rewards and experimented with keeping them visible or hidden. He found that hiding them made it easier to wait, as did offering the children suggestions for how to distract themselves. The results deepened our understanding of the nature of willpower.

Moreover, by showing how thinking can change the manifestation of personality (in this case impulsivity); Mischel’s experiments supported his “social-cognitive” approach to personality.

This challenged Freud’s classic psychoanalytical approach, which saw personality as rooted in instinctual drives and wishes.

In follow-up studies, Mischel found that children better able to develop strategies for delaying gratification spontaneously at ages 4 and 5 became more educationally successful and emotionally intelligent.

“These delay abilities seem to be a protective buffer against the development of all kinds of vulnerabilities later in life,” he concluded.

Before we continue, I’d like you to consider 3 questions:

1. How important is a child’s ability to delay immediate gratification?

2. Is self-discipline a predictor of a child’s success later in life?

3. Can a child who does not know how to delay immediate gratification be taught this skill?

Ok. Let’s take a moment and think about the child in our lives before I give you the results of the study. Close your eyes, visualize your child, grandchild, niece or nephew in The Marshmallow Study room chair. Is she eating? Is he waiting?

We all know exactly what our children will do – or do we?

Fast forward fourteen years to 1988, when the children in the experiment graduated from high school, the Marshmallow Study revealed startling differences between the two groups:

The children who exercised self-discipline and waited for the two marshmallows (65%) were:

• More socially competent
• More personally effective
• More self-assertive
• Better able to cope with life’s frustrations
• Less likely to go to pieces under stress
• Less likely to become disorganized under pressure
• More persistent in the face of difficulties
• More self-reliant and confident
• More trustworthy and dependable
• More initiating and motivated with projects
• Still able to delay gratification in pursuit of goals
• More academically successful
• Better at concentration, planning
• More eager to learn
• Earned 210 points higher scores on SAT’s

These children had developed the habits of successful adults. The habits, the centerpiece of which is delayed gratification and self discipline, point to more thriving marriages, greater career satisfaction which leads to higher incomes, and better health.

The children with exercised low self-control and gobbled up the one marshmallow (35%) were:

• Socially introverted
• More stubborn and indecisive
• More easily upset by frustrations
• More likely to think of themselves as “bad” or unworthy
• More likely to regress or become immobilized by stress
• More mistrustful and resentful about not “getting enough”
• More prone to jealousy and envy
• More likely to overreact to irritations with a sharp temper
• Still unable to delay gratification or control impulses

If not corrected, lack of impulse control will continue to trip these kids up throughout life, resulting in unsuccessful marriages, low job satisfaction and as a result low income, bad health and all around frustration with life.

LET’S Focus on You!

OK. Back to you and the child in your life. If you have a child who is clearly going to be a one-marshmallow kind of kid, don’t despair.

Like any good habit, delayed gratification can be learned. Use your playtime to teach this skill. Choose toys and books and media that reinforce self-discipline and reward the behaviors daily.

Molding desired behavior when children are young and receptive is far easier than the far more challenging work required to change behavior when they are older and perhaps -how can we put it – less receptive to Mom or Dad’s instruction.

Let me provide you with a practical way to do this regarding financial discipline:

If your kids are ‘tweens or teens and have been caught up in the daily barrage of the “I want, therefore I need” spending syndrome, try this riddle.

Ask your child to record what they spend on things they want every day for a week. They can even estimate at the end of each day before they go to bed what that dollar amount is.

Typically these expenses are in the “I want” category, such as snack food or a trinket, not the “I need” category as in laces for those overly expensive sneakers.

At the end of the week sit down and see if they have spent at least $4 a day on “I wants.” Chances are they have spent that, and then some. Then, ask them to quickly answer this multiple choice test – without using a calculator:

At age 12 you decide not to buy soda or extra snacks – either during the school week or on weekends or vacations. You save $4.00 a day. You put $4 a day in a savings vehicle such as a long-term IRA CD at five percent annual interest and leave it alone.

At age 67, your savings is:

(a) $1,159
(b) $25,355
(c) $80,352
(d) $427,025

Answer: (d), or $427,025. Note that $80,352 is from the daily deposits and the remaining $346,673 is interest!

Once you tell them the answer, or they realize it themselves, their eyes will widen with renewed respect for the power and importance of saving – aka delayed gratification and self-discipline.

If we can instill these valuable lessons, we will equip our children with lifelong skills. We will be able to do what every parent hopes – deliver our child into a successful adulthood having learned first-hand the power of two marshmallows.

WHAT TO DO NOW: Share your two-cents worth on the power of delayed gratification and it’s impact on your performance.

While preparing for a recent workshop, I was going through some notes looking for content ideas when I came across my file labeled “Affirmations”.

I had stashed away a story about  the Jeopardy Game Show and Kenneth Wayne Jennings III, its most successful contestant — EVER.

It got me thinking about the Ken Jenning’s saga and how it might inspire you to achieve bigger and better results.

When Ken Jennings was on the show he was Jeopardy’s whiz kid.

He is the all-time leading money winner on American game shows having won $3,172,700.

After 75 days, 975 different categories, and 4575 questions he finally lost.

You know, maybe he didn’t lose, but his opponent won.

Maybe Nancy Zerg, who unseated the phenomenal champion, had something to do with it.

At the time, she told the Associated Press, “She psyched herself up before the game show by repeating to herself this affirmation: someone’s got to beat him sometime, it might as well be me.”

While backstage with her rival contestants she observed one who had lost before the show even started. She heard him say he hoped he wouldn’t be humiliated.

Now let’s focus on you and your performance whatever that may be.

The next time you’re facing either a tough challenge or mental resistance, consider taking a page from Nancy Zerg’s playbook.

Look, it’s easy to worry and get stressed about your next sales call, presentation or meeting.

It’s easy to let your imagination run wild and become paralyzed by fear or self-doubt.

But here’s where Nancy’s game plan can help you improve your performance and achieve your goals.

• She played the game to win.
• She knows actions follow thoughts.
• She believed, without any self-doubt, she could win.
• She psyched herself up and said she could win by repeating this affirmation: “Someone’s got to beat him sometime, it might as well be me.”

You can change the words to Nancy’s affirmation to make it your own.

The lesson to learn is that affirmations do work, mental positioning is a smart move, and that you can overcome any challenge, no matter the size by assuming the position in advance.

Imagine how you will feel, and how well you will perform once you write down and repeat to yourself the ideal outcome.

If you’ve never done this before, you have no idea the impact this will have on your overall results.

Your attitude is everything and everything about your attitude counts.

The real secret to quickly achieving your goals and driving better results is to do what Nancy did.

And never forget this Henry Ford quote. “Whether you think you can or you think you can’t, you’re right!”

Naturally, I prefer to think you can.

WHAT TO DO NOW? Share your two cents worth on the power of affirmations and how they helped you to achieve your goals.

Every action — every detail of our lives — has bottom-line repercussions, and it’s dangerous and derogatory to think of any of those details as trivial, unimportant, or inconsequential.

You may be familiar with the old nursery rhyme which teaches this principle to children:

For want of a nail the shoe was lost.
For want of a shoe the horse was lost.
For want of a horse the rider was lost.
For want of a rider the battle was lost.
For want of a battle the kingdom was lost.
And all for the want of a horseshoe nail.

Downplaying small details, dismissing them as minutia — can and oftentimes will sabotage the biggest goal or project you can conceive.

Ultimately, the key to quality and excellence in every aspect of our lives is doing little things correctly — all the time, every time — so that each action produces a quality result.

When every nitty-gritty detail is lovingly attended to, and each step in the process is given complete and careful attention, the result inevitably will be of the highest quality.


WHAT TO DO NOW? Share your two cents on the importance of nitty-gritty details.

Practice is probably something you think you’re done with when you leave school or when you’ve stopped taking music lessons.

However, having or showing gratitude is also a fine art that comes with practice.

The best way to practice gratitude and giving thanks for being alive…is to:

• Accept 100% responsibility for your life.
• Behave like a gentleman and lady.
• Commit your life to excellence.
• Deliver exceptional results.
• Exceed expectations.
• Focus on solutions.
• Gracefully age.
• Honor your commitments.
• Inspire through your actions.
• Joyfully embrace each day.
• Keep your promises.
• Leave a lasting legacy.
• Model best practices.
• Necessitate high, uniform, ethical standards.
• Open your mind to new ideas.
• Passionately pursue your dreams.
• Quickly solve problems.
• Reciprocate and pay it forward.
• Showcase your talents.
• Talk lovingly.
• Undertake challenging tasks.
• Vote to protect and defend democracy.
• Welcome and embrace change.
• Zealously do what is right, good and noble.

There is a special kind of magic in the practice of showing gratitude.

It raises our consciousness, recharges our energy, enhances our self-worth, and strengthens our spirit!

WHAT TO DO NOW? Share your two-cents worth on what it means to show appreciation.

Seven Days of Giving

Reciprocity is defined as a mutual exchange. It simply explains that that when someone gives you something or does something for you, that you feel an obligation to give back and return the favor.

Serial reciprocity is exactly what one might expect – a series of sequential exchanges between parties.

This set of exchanges is unique because they do not occur between two people in a closed quid pro quo arrangement.

Instead, serial reciprocity is “when people repay the benefits they have received – for example, from a parent, friend, mentor, anonymous stranger, or a previous generation – by providing benefits to a third party, someone other than their benefactor”

Serial reciprocity differs from other forms of reciprocity because the original donor or volunteer does not receive anything tangible, measurable or immediate in return for his or her initial good deed.

I define serial reciprocity as, “the principle that says we should repay the good works and contributions done for us by the good works and contributions we, in turn, do for others”

Thus, in serial reciprocity, individuals “pay it forward” instead of paying it back.

In the film Pay it Forward, a teacher asks his young students to fix what they don’t like about the world. A student, Trevor, completes the assignment by helping three people.

In return, he asks only that each individual help three more people, and request that they do the same. Trevor hopes to change the world one action at a time using the principle of serial reciprocity to begin an unending chain of positive events.

The 7-Day Benevolence Challenge

I’d like to offer you a 7-Day Benevolence Challenge where you will engage in a series of random acts of benevolence and expect nothing in return.

GUIDELINES

1. For each of the next seven days, identify a person or group of people whom you would like to help.

* You can choose one person for each of the seven days, and you can also recruit others to participate in the challenge with you.

2. Think of a special act of benevolence that you would like to do for them.

3. Be creative, if possible, refrain from using money, use your melon and think of ways to use your time, talents or special gifts to blow someone?s mind, or simply put a smile on their face.

4. Remain anonymous.

5. Leave a note for the beneficiary of your benevolence. Ask them to Pass it On and do a good deed for someone else.

Why Should You Participate?

Serial reciprocity is of critical importance on four accounts. The first, and most obvious, is that it widens the circle of giving, allowing recipients to become givers by doing good deeds for another.

Second, the deeds of these “new” givers perpetuate benevolent action and ensure its place in society.

Third, serial reciprocity is essential to the transmission of benevolent values from one generation to the next.

Finally, the ultimate test of the impact of an individual is twofold: whether the world they left is qualitatively different from that which they inherited, and what contribution they made to that change.

Therefore by participating in the 7-Day Benevolence Challenge, you are helping to make the world a better place and inspiring others to do the same.

I hope that by sharing this understanding of serial reciprocity and by offering it as a challenge, that it illuminates benevolent motives in people throughout the world.

I believe that once people recognize the importance of serial reciprocity and consider its implications, it becomes difficult to imagine daily life without engaging in random acts of benevolence.

So what are you waiting for? Begin your challenge today, and be sure to pass this message on to everyone in your address book.

What To Do Now? Begin your 7-Day Challenge and post all of the fun, kooky and creative ideas you come up with. In addition, tell us how you felt when you were engaged in these anonymous acts of benevolence.

Olympic champion swimmer Michael Phelps.

The other night I was watching a 60 Minutes interview with Olympic Champion Michael Phelps. During the interview, the host Anderson Cooper showed pictures of Phelps winning the 100-meter butterfly final at the Water Cube in Beijing by ONE-HUNDREDTH of a second over Serbia’s Milorad Cavic.

Phelps admitted that his winning margin of one-hundredth of a second was almost impossible to see but it was because of ONE small difference, on the final stroke Cavic lifted his head up just slightly which acted as a mini speed bump and I kept my head down streamlined. Small stuff matters a lot!

It’s important to keep in mind that high achievers in every vocation turn over all stones, understanding and exploiting to their benefit the fact that the critical difference between merely acceptable versus excellent results lies in the smallest of details.

They acknowledge and accept that the difference between Gold and Silver at the Olympics can be traced to the tiniest of details in training or execution; as a result, they make everything count!

WHAT TO DO NOW? Share your own two cents or personal story on the importance of small details that led to a big success.

The small details matter.

There’s a very popular book series that has enjoyed a long life on the best seller list titled, Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff.

It offers a philosophy that is immensely popular, but highly flawed as it panders to the majority by telling them what they want to hear rather than what they need to do.

As pragmatic advice on how to run a business and live a life of excellence, it’s a big steaming pile of nonsense. This is bad advice, and it spells trouble in the current economy.

All the power and leverage is with the customer and they will exercise their power by leaving one business in favor of another over very small things, things that could have easily been avoided by simply using common sense and paying attention to the small stuff.

Every business is severely and adversely affected by poor customer retention. If a customer abandons one restaurant or coffee shop for another it’s most likely NOT because of the food or coffee, but due to dissatisfaction over a small detail like;

• Having to hunt down a waiter for more coffee or the check
• Not receiving a genuine welcome or prompt greeting
• Too long on hold when making reservations
• Table conversation constantly interrupted
• Gum or debris on the ground
• Too long a wait for service
• An unclean fork or glass
• Apathetic personnel
• A filthy bathroom
• No eye contact

The cost of losing a customer is multiplied in tough times simply because there is a smaller pool of replacements and much more intense competition for them.

Do NOT be fooled by mainstream news; businesses like Circuit City are not suddenly upside down thanks only to a credit crunch or drop in customer spending; there’s much more to their suddenly revealed weaknesses than that. They have gone on too long not sweating the small stuff, and now they are suffering consumer’s revenge.

If you have any interest in being competitive than start sweating the small stuff because every little thing does count.

WHAT TO DO NOW? Share your two cents worth on the importance of sweating the small stuff.